Saturday, December 8, 2007

Miscellany in a Bio-Bag: The Soundtrack of My Life!!!




Hank Williams Jr., Country Boy Can Survive”: Showing this video to others feels like breaking the baby pictures out. It brings to mind thoughts of nostalgia and minor embarrassment, as most of the scenes in the video remind me of the small town of my childhood. The small town café, the mechanic’s shop, the grain elevators; this was my life. One scene in particular (about 1:07) brings images flowing back. The scene shows hunters moving through a wood. One of the hobbies my father and I enjoyed was anything to do with firearms.
He had a decent collection of antiquated rifles, they were the only thing he would accept as a good firearm; he laughed at people who used new low recoil rifles with scopes and butt-pads. One of my favorite rifles in his collection was a 30-06 that was older than he was. His father had bought it from army surplus when they were selling after World War II. It was a long, rustic, and strangely beautiful weapon. It was a bolt action, capable of holding only six or eight bullets, I can’t remember for sure which. The wood showed its age, as it was pock marked with dents and scrapes from stock to forend. The rear site was a small hole about the width of a sharpie head, and the front was a raised bead about the diameter of the tip of a pen. There were two dials on the rear site block for adjusting for wind and distance, neither of which did I have the patience to master.
One experience as a child that the scene in the video reminded me of was the first time I attempted to fire that rifle. I had reached the admirable age of about eight, and the mighty weight of a little under 70 lbs. I had done reasonably well with .22s up to this point, but a 30-06 is no small gun. My father had a cruel sense of humor, and the first time I tried to fire that rifle, I was standing straight up, and he decided not to warn me. The kick knocked me straight on my back, and my dad about fell on his laughing. Despite the bruised shoulder and ego, it is still one of my favorite pieces.



Let Go, by Frou Frou: Weird song, weird movie, weird people. Perfect. This video is a slew of scenes from the movie “Garden State” (Yeah that’s right, kind of a chick flick but nevertheless a kick ass movie). While one of the best songs from the movie plays in the background, it visually tells the story of a man who has come back to his hometown after several years of absence. The part of the video that struck me the most was the scene where he is at a party (roughly 1:00 and off an on for the rest of the video). While under the influence of God’s most curiously toxic yet delightful creation, ecstasy, he is shown having the time of his life yet feeling harrowingly awkward.
The scenes bring me back to the first ‘social’ (sounds better than ‘party’) house that I can remember. I imagine that being filthy rich and growing up dirt poor in a small town have one thing in common; the extreme need to entertain oneself. Ergo I was introduced to the Knudsen household, which was, much like the household above, ridiculously enjoyable yet awkward(There was no ecstasy…). It was an old house on a hill, possessing an ironically comfortable feel due to years of mismanagement and maltreatment. It had a basement and two stories, with porches on both floors. The carpets were old shag rugs with a peculiar animalistic smell to them, and none of the walls or ceilings were ever really finished, giving the rooms a nasty pseudo hardwood feel to them. Despite the rundown aura of the entire property, there was an uncannily exquisite stove and a horribly misplaced brass and oak door that must have been wondering what ungodly sin that tree had done to damn its existence to this household. I’m sire the house has been condemned for demolition by now, but no wrecking ball will be able to purge me of the experiences I had there when I began to understand the beauty of human interaction.




Rise Against, Survive: This isn’t an official video for the song, but its cooler so that makes it ok. The video begins with a biker beautifully demonstrating a classic ’crash and burn’ off the side of a hill. It then fast forwards to three months later and shows the adrenaline junky nailing the jump, in accordance with the overlying lyrical theme of the video, survival. The song is urging getting up every time after a fall, as said in the chorus: “Life for you has been less than kind. So take a number, and stand in line. We’ve all been sorry, we’ve all been hurt... But how we survive, is what makes us who we are.”
Most kids have some sort of experience with bikes throughout their childhood, and mine was no different. My cousins and I were infamous among our town for turning public sites into jump ranges. My first bike was pretty sweet. It was tiny, which I guess fit my five or six years. It was a one speed, off brand chrome beast with neon green stickers plastered all over the frame. There must have been something weak about the tires because they could never seem to hold air for longer than a week or two, no matter how many thorns and nails I put into them.
By the end of a few years, that bike had had the crap beaten out of it. Those sweet stickers were peeling off, the wheels were bent slightly, causing the bike to bob up and down when I coasted, and the rubber grip from the right handle was almost completely torn off from countless wrecks. Common sense would say that we would have stopped jumping off of anything we could pile up, but would have been way too easy.






Blink 182, I Won’t Be Home For Christmas: ‘It’s Christmas time again,’ and what would a video biography be without a section on Christmas (since the season now encompasses 1/6 of our lives…)? This song is very fitting for me because of my attitude on Christmas, but the part of the video that caught my attention was his girlfriend putting up Christmas lights while the singer was contemplating suicide by latrinal asphyxiation.
No matter what the weather is the Friday after Thanksgiving, there is a tradition spanning back thousands of years in my immediate family that says the Christmas lights on our house must go up. The exterior festive décor of our home has been evolving every year, but the basics remain the same. There’s a ridiculous amount of lights, always the colored kind, since we save the clear for inside. Every aspect of the house that can hold a straight line or spiral or more or less spirited up somehow. The only thing that’s missing is something my father’s been looking for for years; a big, shining white star to put on top of the house.
The crown jewel of the Christmas display was the manger scene. A while back my brother took it into his hands to fashion life size wooden replicas of the Holy Family and their motley posse. We somehow always manage to muster up some hay bails to place around the wooden frame of the barn/cave thing. Even though I’m not a fan of massive Christmas celebration, I can’t help feel a little noel cheer when I see the lights.








Chad Kroger, Josey Scott, Hero: Let me first say one thing that will summarize this entire piece; Spiderman is amazing. I believe this song was the theme song for the first Spiderman movie that came out a few years past. Way before the movies came out, and even today, Spiderman was the coolest guy on the planet. When I was in grade school, his cartoon would be on from 3:30 to 4:00, and my principle reason for not wanting to be kept after school was so that I could make it home before the show started.
I could identify with Spiderman at the time; he was a loveable nerd who some people couldn’t get enough of while a whole lot more wished that a giant newspaper would smash him and send him down the sink to the spider cemetery. I couldn’t identify with his heroics, but they were something to dream about. He was the classic underdog story, always outmanned and usually fighting someone three times his size, but he managed to outwit them to come out in the end with a victory and sometimes the girl.
My parents weren’t very fond of the fact that I spent my afternoons with Spidey; my mom thought he was too violent and my dad thought I should be doing homework. The latter was most likely true, as I had a horrible time with doing homework as a child. When a ten year old gets to choose between swinging through the skies of New York with someone cool like Spiderman or doing long division, there’s really not much doubt on which he will choose.







Melee, Built to Last: This video would probably seem crazy to anyone who hasn’t seen a movie in the last fifteen years. However, for the rest of us who grew up watching a flick every now and then, at least a few of the scenes seem very familiar in a parodic way. The scenes that he encounters in the video are all from movies that my generation and I grew up watching, including but not limited to Pretty Woman, 16 Candles, Ghost, Titanic, Say Anything, Napoleon Dynamite, American Pie, Broke Back Mountain, My Girl, Hope Floats, Happy Gilmore, Jerry McGuire, Forest Gump, and A Walk to Remember.
Collectively, these scenes developed a good deal of the clichéd stereotypical images that come to my mind when I think of relationships. There are the lovable images of a girl with roses jumping into some guys arms, porch front serenades, piggy back rides, and making out on the beach. Then there are also more down to earth yet more comical scenes of people doing things like playing tether ball, a mime kissing the invisible person in front of him, or Jim from American Pie violating an apple pie (I‘m sure it was consensual).
If we would compare these to love scenes from the 50’s, I’m sure we’d see quite a difference. I guess love has taken a bit of a turn since then. There’s also a scene with two cowboys cuddling on a picnic cloth. My mother would say society’s going to the crapper. I don’t mind it that much.





Tracy Chapman, Give Me One Reason: So, how in the hell does this video relate to me? Well, other than the remarkable resemblance between Ms. Chapman and I, it is one of the songs that a couple of friends and I that could hardly be called a one gig band played. We picked the song because it had a slow swinging beat, was something most people knew, and was easy to play. These were the characteristics of the band. We weren’t too flashy, we weren’t very deep, and we weren’t very good. A plan for stardom is doomed to fail if you throw together a lead guitarist that like hard rock, a rhythm guitarist that like Ben Harper, a drummer that’s usually too hung over to show up, and an insane blues harmonica player.
As you can imagine, the music we made was a strange mix. When we actually came up with a few originals, what came out of the oven was something that kind of reminded me of a Caribbean mix, like Santana only not nearly as cool (and usually acoustic due to our drummer’s chronic brown bottle flu). The experience was unforgettable though, and for a summer, the four of us (maybe I should say 3 ½) were kings of our own little pathetic world.






RED, Lost: This video’s link to my life will be pretty easy to figure out: the halo trilogy, and the time that my friends have spent playing this thing. While other groups of kids would choose to do whatever kids these days do on Saturday nights, guys in my class would often end up in someone’s basement, with four or five X-boxes linked up together, having massive computerized battles to the death.
God knows how this game will stand up to games twenty years from now, but for the time that they were released, all three games had outstanding graphics and movement. The game isn’t insanely gory like some are (see Manhunt 2) and in campaign mode enemies have adorable original conversations before you crush the back of their skullJ. The games take you to crazy new worlds in a time that we wouldn’t recognize today. It’s a semi-original story that takes place about 500 years from now; there’s a big war and everyone’s getting there butts kicked until the hero comes.
The best part of the game, however, has been proven to be in multiplayer. No matter how good AI is, human players usually make a game a lot more interesting. There’s always a good deal of pent up energy and tension in a group of friends, and I can’t imagine any healthier way to absolve our differences than to hit someone in the back of the head with a sticky grenade (except for hitting them in the front of the head).

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Check Yes Or No

( I deleted the video because it kept auto starting and it was angering me.)

Well well well, we’re back here at our usual Sunday and Wednesday night hang out. I know some of you (namely one) were turned off last week by the fact that I decided to use a country video in my post, so I took that into consideration. This week’s post is on the first video I can remember watching, which happens to be a George Strait western video titled “Check Yes or No.” Several factors make it seem reasonable that this would be my devirginizing video. One is that in the house of my early youth, any genre that sounded like rock and roll was the work of the devil, and we didn’t even know what rap was. I honestly think it would have been regarded lower on the list of unholies than Hitler himself. So yes, deionization of pop culture is one reason why the video is country.
The second is that we lived very far out in the country, close to Tibet but not quite to Lancashire. This meant that the only TV station we got was PBS when it was cloudy out; or maybe it was when it wasn’t cloudy… anywho. We had a VCR from the 70’s, so whenever my sisters went to see my Grandmother up north (bless her soul) they made liberal use of her cable TV, and captured well over a hundred hours of CMT videos and brought them back home with them. Therefore, I watched a lot of country videos.
This one happens to be the first I can remember, and it fits me well. Corny, twangy, ridiculous in general. The part I love the most is how it gives ugly kids the hope that they can hook up with pretty girls. Gives hope to all those crazy little horn dogs.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

"Oops, I made the worst video ever..."

Writer’s note: First, I would just like to mention that I am currently a fugitive of the law. The sheriff is ga ga about finding me and I haven’t yet let him. Life has never been better. And now for something completely different.

Every hundred years or so, a masterpiece is created; something comes into existence that stirs the heart, delights the eyes, and blows the mind, entangling all the instruments of the imagination into a euphoric psychological orgy. Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” is a perfect example of this. It exhibits the potential greatness of human productivity while showing the beauty and slight insignificance of our existence.



Britney Spears' “Oops, I Did It Again” video, however, is the absolute antithesis of this greatness. First off, why the hell is the man landing on Mars at the beginning of the video? I spent a good 8 minutes pondering on this (six more than I believe anything to do with Spears is worth) and came to the conclusion that maybe it had something to do with the ‘Men from Mars, Women from Venus’ thing. But in that case, shouldn’t she be on Venus if the man is discovering her world? It would work on Mars if she was a transvestite and he was exploring his sexual preferences for the first time, but I think we left Spears in the dust about 224 words ago with the thought train, so I’m putting that idea in the ’about as likely as Hilary Clinton having a heart’ tray. In either situation, I have one word for that young man; turnthefrickaround.

Granted, this video was made years before the baby dangling, 18 marriages in six hours, car crashes, and public indecency happened, but the omens for what to come were clear. There is a path that one can take to make this a decently good music video… press mute.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

World on Fire

As a student of history, peering into the lives and culture of people who have long since passed from our presence, I have always found it amusing to imagine how my own life and culture will be looked upon by the generations of those to come. It's disheartening, however, to realize that scholars of the past focus primarily on the flaws that men foster rather that the virtues that they uphold. Wars, scandals, the barbarianism of ancients; these are the things we study. How then, will we be remembered by those who study us?


LYRICS

If one from the future or present were to look at pop culture (a music video, per se) it could be assumed that we are very materialistic people. This isn’t news to most people, but the problem that it causes is quite often misunderstood. There is no misdeed in taking pleasure in some thing; the self-transgression occurs when we allow gadgets to suppress our personal relationships. If you look at a music video, chances are you will usually see someone obsessed with the bling dangling around their neck, their clothes that cost as much as some houses, or their cars with a hot tub in the back. In her video of the song “World on Fire,” Sarah McLachlan tries to show the flaw in this standard of producing videos, and does so very effectively.
In the beginning of the video, McLachlan uses the simplistic setting to establish an ethos persona that eliminates any possibility of hypocrisy in her message. It begins very simply, with a somber McLachlan sitting in a modest room, amber guitar over her lap. The room looks like an average apartment, or possibly a hotel room. There are white walls, a tan carpet, and brown furniture; everything is very lackluster. McLachlan is wearing a tank top, jeans, and no shoes. Her hair is done very casually. It’s almost as if the cameraman entered the room a few minutes ago and surprised her. The lack of impression is rather shocking, ironically.
The video is shot in very poor quality, probably by a machine that one could get their hands on at Wal-Mart. There is no camera movement, only straight forward shots. The first text that appears is very simple, yet blunt. “This video cost $150,000.” The dollar amount is in bold red font, augmenting the first thought that comes into the mind of the viewer; “That’s a lot of money for a video.” It’s rather surprising in an illogical way. The delay that comes next has perfect timing. It shows nothing but a straight shot of McLachlan, sitting strumming and singing. Twenty seconds later, as most people would be almost ready to change the video, text appears once again, but this time in pure white. “What’s wrong with this video? Well it only cost $15 to make.”
Up to this point, the set up for the argument has been completely logical, but with the next image, it begins to turn to a more argument which utilizes pathos. Almost instantly, an image of a world map appears with many of the globe’s poorest areas highlighted. This shifts the readers attention in a very rapid, and nearly uncomfortable fashion, from the artist’s face to the realization that there is a massive world outside of the white walls of that apartment. Overshadowing that image is a text that reads “$150,000 could make a difference to over 1,000,000 people.”
The rhetorical appeal of pathos aforementioned is amplified by the music being played. It is a somber, slightly sad, and almost tired song, but has a spark of hope somehow wrapped within the music; a hopeful lift after the minor 'fall', if you’re looking intimately at the music theory. (If you are into the theory aspect of music, the writer stratigically placed progressions as follows; C Major, D Minor, C Major, and later, F Major, A minor, G major. Somber lyrics and pictures are placed specifically at the minor 'falls' {where the music gets 'more sad'} and more hopeful lyrics and images are placed where the Major resumes.) Even though that by now the music has taken a back seat to the images due to the speed that they are coming at, it is grabbing the emotions of the viewer and telling them that there are major problems being addressed here, but somewhere down the road, the specifics unknown to the viewer, there is hope.
The text mentioned previously forces the viewer to ask themselves how $150,000 could affect one million people. This time, the audience isn’t kept waiting long, as a laundry list of ‘this is how’ soon follows. Text appears and makes a comparative statement that claims that $200 (in bold red font) could either be used in LA to pay a production manager for one day, or in Ethiopia to pay for 100 children’s school fees for a term.
It is a logical appeal that also employs pathos, as this seems very drastic and logical at the same time. The observer is forced to feel pity for the children that are shown because they have heard of the hardships that they have grown up with in their childhoods. It is also only logical that if one had to choose where the money would be better spent, most minds would put a higher precedence on tuition for 100 than advice on how to make a video from one. People watching understand that if a person in a third world county doesn’t go to school, they will most likely end up making sneakers for Nike. The great thing about people realizing this is that they are not thinking about themselves at this moment in time.
Several more texts appear, mentioning the $5000 for hair and make-up that was used to pay for 150 Afghani girls to go to school and the $500 for a studio playback that was used to buy enough nuts and bolts to hold together 50 houses in tsunami hit areas. The video always seems to be a few seconds ahead of the person watching it, because it was at this time that I was watching and wondering how much they wanted me to donate, and slightly after, a pure white text appeared and stated that they wanted no money. This plays onto the character of the artist, reassuring everyone that they aren’t running a con.
Possibly the best use of pathos in this video was the instance that a single African mother is introduced. At the moment they introduce her, the words “don’t want to be left alone” are sung in the background in a dual-media comination. The video mentions that the mother works two jobs, 16 hours a day, seven days a week to raise the $200 she needs to send her son to school for a year. When watching her, one notices that she cracks a smile, even in her pitiable situation. Immediately after, one can see that the words “Psalm 118 5-12” are painted in bold on her tin front door. At first glance, the verse shows that she is Christian and therefore relates her to many of the viewers that would be watching this video. But if one gives in to their curiosity and looks up the verse, they can find out why she is smiling. The gist of the verse states that despite the impoverished region to which she was born and the mistreatment that political entities have given her, she understands that they can do nothing to her soul, and that her happiness stems from the core of herself and her family that remains.
At this point in the video, the slides start to roll almost too fast to read. Two hours of film stock costs enough to build six wells. The money for a production supervisor could give independence to 100 Afghani widows. The catering to the studio for a day could buy 10,950 meals for street kids in Calcutta. The high rate of change gives the viewer a sense of just how many problems there are in the world.
The best logical argument came late in the song, when they mention that the $15,000 that would be used for styling costs could be used to help many of the 12 million people who are blind because of cataracts. It is an ironic statement that the money could be used to make something more aesthetic, or be used to allow people to see anything, aesthetic or not.
At the apogee of the song, the artist once again engages in a argument of pathos, by changing the pictures to more uplifting scenes; dancing, bright lights, people clasping hands, and clean running water. This gives people a slight hope that although there is bad, there is also good.
In her video, McLachlan urges viewers to understand the frailty of their existence; that rather than LA or NYC, they could have been born in Calcutta. She does not say that we are morally obligated to donate to any cause across the world, but just asks her audience to accept the realization that our problems would be considered luxuries to others in the world. The argument is the siren for a counter-culture. Look at the most famous cultural art set in LA right now; Nip Tuck, The Hills, Dr. 90210. It’s a very self absorbed culture. She’s not saying that you need to save the world, but don’t act like it revolves around you. And oh, does she argue it well.

Thunder Rolls, Sims Style.


This isn't the original video for this song, but the original is my favorite and the remake is hilarious, so I decided to take some writer’s liberty. So, why is this video the most amazing thing on the planet since sliced salami and Bacardi Malts(not in the same sitting)? It all begins with our man of the hour, Garth Brooks. I’m not a huge fan of country, especially all that twangy Gretchen Wilson crap, but this man is my favorite artist and hero. We could have done without George Washington, but where would this nation be without Garth??? Then there’s the actual song, which is scary as hell, unhealthily energetic, and sends a stronger message than monks in red togas lighting themselves on fire: “Guys, watch the fire truck out, if you get caught cheating, Hell hath no wrath like a woman with a shotgun.” There’s also a very touching sentimental message about domestic abuse, but that’s uncomfortable for everyone to talk about so we’ll do the right thing and sweep it back under the rug. Then there’s the fact that this very emotionally charged situation is being played out by the Sims. Maybe it’s some ridiculously deep philosophical thesis on the quasi-psychological laws that govern our inconsequential ahegenometic cybernetic existences. Maybe it’s just funny as hell to see soft core computer animated porn. I don’t know, but the fact is that it is a great contrast to hear really serious music chastising the wrongs in our society and seeing our animated creations attempting to do the same, possibly even trying to procreate. (PS, I added a word to the English language in this last paragraph. 1 EC point if anyone figures out which it was.)